Stop Comparing Yourself, It’s Holding You Back

A lot of people underestimate the negative impact that comparison has on their life. It sucks because so many of us do it so often that we don’t even recognize it anymore. We sit on social media scrolling from one post to the next and with each and every post you have a different feeling.

“I wish I lived in that type of apartment” or  “I wish I could buy my own house” 

“I wish I could afford to get a new car” or “I wish I had a car I actually liked” 

“I wish my boyfriend would surprise me like that” or “I wish my engagement was done like that” 

“I wish my friends were that outgoing” or “I wish I had a friend like Johnathan and Meg Thee Stallion” 

“I wish I could get in shape like that” or “I wish people loved the way my body looks” 

By the time you finish scrolling, you subconsciously feel unfulfilled. You are no longer grateful for what you have and instead, feel like you wish you had more. It’s the easiest way for you to knock yourself and it also shatters your motivation. “Why am I doing all of this if I’m not seeing the same results as [my favorite blogger]? 

You want to know what’s stopping you from seeing the results you want to see? YOU! You are putting your focus on the wrong things. You cannot control other people’s lives, but you can control yours. So focus on making it a life worth living (which is relative to you). 

Be proud of and grateful for what you do have instead of focusing on what others have that you do not. You don’t know what it took for them to get to that point. It’s also very unfair to you to compare your part of your journey to their part of their journey; stop comparing your worst to their best. You can only compare what you see so you compare their success (that you see) with your struggle (that you feel). Give yourself more credit because you owe that much to yourself. Understand that you, your journey, your life is unique to you. Stop comparing your life and start living it. 

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4 Comments

  1. Jacqueline Pierce
    November 20, 2019 / 4:14 am

    Wow – Brianna – I am completely guilty of the “I wish Syndrome. I don’t put myself down, but I often say I wish I had the discipline to eat better, exercise more, etc.

    I work work on being as positive about me and who I am as I am about others! Thanks for the Push

    • Bri Lew
      Author
      November 20, 2019 / 3:52 pm

      You are certainly welcome. I have the tendency to be hard on myself as well so I definitely understand.

  2. Emilyariel Gonzalez
    February 25, 2020 / 7:12 pm

    Its funny how the courage the dive into yourself can be either a gradual move or a confident impulsive one. I am the gradual one haha. Though following your blog post for the past year and being able to have met you years ago, you’ve truly inspired me to challenge myself daily and worry only about how I’m growing. I appreciate you doing what you’re doing and hope you never stop shining. This specific blog post keeps me in check when I get off track. Shoooo’ your whole insta does for me but when I need that extra oomph, I know where to go. Blessed for your presence in this world and I love to support you from where I can. Keep it up Bri. Also, my comment is lengthy (sorry not sorry) haha.

    • Bri Lew
      Author
      February 27, 2020 / 7:35 pm

      Aw, Emily. This means so much to me. Thank you! Gradual is better than stagnant. I always tell myself that progress is better than perfect and perfection doesn’t exist so we must keep making progress. Xoxoxoxo

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